It depends where it happens. Getting killed in Paludal at 40 would be embarrassing.
Getting killed trying to do something difficult is perfectly acceptable.
Really the attitude you describe is a very low level outlook. The way the game is designed if you went throughh it never dying you would be playing it very safe and not pushing your abilities at all.
Of course death can be annoying and I think all clerics feel a sense of failure when people get killed - unless they were being idiots.
If people die repeatedly in the same place doing the same thing then they are obviously not learning from their mistakes.
There will be times when bad luck dogs you and unseen adds arrive, spells are resisted, fizzle, get interrupted and so on. This just has to be borne.
However you have not "lost the game" when you die. In fact you have probably "lost the game" if you
never die because you are no longer playing it.
Especially in the raiding game being wiped repeatedly is normal and character-building. You cannot find out how to defeat something if you quit after the first wipe or if you never try until you have 3 times the force needed.
Some classes die a lot as a matter of course. Pullers are exposed and have to be able to put up with it. Enchanters are also one of the first classes to get aggro if the MA loses it.
Then there are DT mobs. Someone who steps up to eat the DT hasn't "lost" anything. They have done what was needed without complaint and benefitted their comrades in the best traditions of heroic fantasy.
I would never leave a group
because I died. That is a cheap trick and they were probably right to blame the lack of your dps for some part of it. However if the group is just plain incompetent then leaving it in normal exp settings is perfectly ok even before you die. In LDoN I'd write it off to experience and accept that I signed on for the adventure.
Soloing you can die for many other reasons than bad tactics or location. Someone else getting killed can leave mobs wandering outside normal patterns, trains happen, there are "camp-breaker" mobs. Even the simple things like lag and LD can mean death but not because you were doing anything wrong yourself.
You are making a big deal out of dying that will not be generally understood and will give people the impression you are afraid of it.
Quote:
If someone dies in a group obviously something went wrong and I will make my comrades think about why it did happen and how we can avoid it next time.
The group will not want a teach-in or discussion after something as simple as a pacify resist or resistant add in an LDoN. You may have suggestions but nobody can "make" them think. You are sounding like the archetypal "bossy cleric" that gets us all a bad name.